The Anubistic animal kingdom: the difference between brutes and animals
The Prophet often hears talk of the "dominant alpha male" and other such delights...
by The Prophet — 2026-01-15
1 Since Anubis is, as everyone knows, a Dog-Godly being, all animals are welcome in Anubism, provided they are not brutes.
2 Anubism does not distinguish animals from humans, but animals from brutes: let us try to explain the difference.
3 The Prophet often hears people talk of the “dominant alpha male” and other such delights applied to a human individual, and, like a good Anubist, he finds them chilling.
4 Yet another debate on the matter has led him into a deep Dog-Godly adoration, which today he will share with the Adepts.
5 Historically, the dominant alpha male was the one who imposed himself at the head of a community through violence.
6 Imagine the monstrous damage done to the history of human development by the fact that at the head of the tribes stood the “alpha male”, who was necessarily also the most ignorant, because whoever wants to impose himself is necessarily ignorant.
7 Ignorance at the head of a system can only breed ignorance, and that is partly why, for Anubism, all men are born not with “original sin” but with “original dickheadedness”.
8 Now, for the sake of clarity, we urgently need to define the Anubistic view of the animal world as it relates to humans.
9 In biology it is customary to set humans apart from beasts, but that is not a distinction the Anubistic view recognises.
10 In the Anubist view, the whole animal world divides into brutes and Anubist animals.
11 The criterion behind the distinction is a simple question: “Are you dominant, an alpha male, do you want to be in charge, do you need to bust other people's balls?
12 Are you submissive, an arse-licker, a politician, do you need someone to boss you around?”
- If even one of the two questions gets a yes, whoever answered is a brute, because at bottom he does not respect the second precept (be patient, you will find them all in the next chapter), which is not to bust anyone's balls.
- If he answers no to both questions, then he is an Anubist.
13 It is all very simple, and this distinction, far from being reductive, will allow the adept to live in peace.
14 Whenever a being is not Anubist, sidestep it quickly but elegantly, thinking “Dog God, what a brute!”.
15 This clarification also explains why non-human animals are welcome in Anubism, provided, of course, they are not brutes.
16 When the Anubist German shepherd crosses paths with the brute chihuahua that pesters him with aggressive barking, the shepherd will simply walk away, aware that any discussion is pointless unless it is harmful to the ignorant little brute.
17 In the world of the Brutes they will argue about authority, about who is in charge, about alpha males, about who dominates and who submits.
18 The female Brutes will choose the alpha male and they will all live unhappily and ignorantly ever after.
19 In the world of the Anubists everyone will mind their own fucking business, they will choose whom to be with or not according to how pleasant the company is, and at most there will be the idea of earned authority.
20 And take the chance to think “Who the fuck is this brute?” every time you hear talk of “alpha males”, “dominant types” and so on.