How to find inspiration for new and original Anubistic Prayers

Dearest Adept, I want to welcome you to the new look of the Anubism website...

by The Prophet — 2026-01-15

Context

Every Italian learns at school Manzoni's line «ai posteri l'ardua sentenza», "let posterity be the judge". The Prophet swaps posteri (posterity) for postumi (a hangover).

1 Dearest Adept, on this side of the screen today is Grand Master Pheel.

2 On behalf of myself and the Prophet, I want to welcome you to the new look of the Anubism website, the fruit of a precious collaboration with Grand Master Jack.

3 If you are one of the old guard, though, fear not: the old site has not been lost.

4 You can still reach it from the footer of the new site by clicking on “Sacred Relic”.

5 From there you will see the original temple, founded back in the now distant (sigh!) 2012!

6 Though some time has passed since its founding, Anubism today is stronger than ever.

7 Maybe because of the times we live in, maybe because people are starting to get sick of dealing with ballbusting authorities, or simply because we have all always felt the Anubistic presence in our lives.

8 Anubistic prayer seems to come naturally to the inhabitants of the Boot, whatever region they hail from.

9 Even so, for some mysterious reason, the Anubistic presence is stronger in the centre and north of Italy.

10 Could it be that the ballbusting is worse up there and there is more need for a little Enlightenment? Let the hangover be the judge.

11 That said, today I would like to look more closely at Anubistic Prayer itself.

12 Indeed, as the Prophet suggests: “It is important for the Anubist always to find new and imaginative ways of praying to the Trinity.

13 The greater the imagination, the greater the human's satisfaction and joy.”

14 But how do you find inspiration without necessarily sinking into vulgarity?

15 How do you praise Anubis in a fun and imaginative way?

16 Once again the Egyptians come to our rescue.

17 Look at the following image. What do you notice? Exactly, they are hieroglyphs.

18 The favourite writing system of that mysterious civilisation.

19 Something ancient and incomprehensible, you will say, forgetting that this way of communicating is so powerful that it has come back stronger than ever in our own day.

20 In next to no time, in fact, our alphabets made only of letters have been enriched with dozens and dozens of little pictures that by now form an alphabet of their own, understood by 80% of the world's population.

21 Your ears, pricked up towards Enlightenment, have already worked out what I am talking about, haven't they? Exactly. Emoji.

22 And now I will show you a few ways to use them to perform incredibly satisfying adorations.

23 Open any chat, preferably with another Adept like you, and start by choosing which member of the Trinity to praise.

24 Let us start with Anubis himself: ⬆️🐶

25 Now all we have to do is recall the freshest bit of ballbusting and depict it using hieroglyphs alone.

26 Using episodes from real life always works to give the adoration the right enthusiasm and sincerity, not to mention its considerable exorcising power over the event itself.

27 Repeating it and reliving it until you start to digest it and drain it of meaning is one of the Grand Masters' secrets for getting your calm back even in the darkest moments.

28 Only knowledge sets you free.
29 Free to reason clearly and to make decisions that will raise your AQL (Anubistic Quality of Life)

30 Speaking of AQL, today I want to share with you one of the lessons from the Sacred Tome, in the chapter on the Anubistic Meaning of Life:

31 Let us introduce the value AQL, that is, Anubistic Quality of Life: AQL equals the algebraic sum of the value of every hour lived in a given day.

32 In short, AQL = AF (Anubistic Fun) – BB (Ballbusting).

33 May Anubis be with you!

34 Grand Master Pheel